Funny Spam

If you're gonna have a blog, you'd better like spam. If not, you're gonna at least have to learn to live with it.

Of course, I'm not talking about that processed meat in a can. I'm talking about the barrage of senseless comments that get posted to your blog out of nowhere by seemingly no one. While a few may have some salty language, they are generally harmless. That said, these annoying bits of bytes get in the way of otherwise interesting, entertaining and occasionally insulting comments.

Blogger's automatic spam filter does a pretty good job of catching most of this crap. But, a few get through. So, every week or two I'll look at the comments on my Blogger "dashboard" and clean out the spam. It's not a big deal, really. But, every time I do it I consider enabling word verification or disabling anonymous comments. I'm not a big fan of unscrambling letters to prove I'm not a robot, so I hesitate to ask visitors to this here blog to do the same. And, prohibiting anonymous comments seems just plain mean. As long as it isn't a big hassle, I'll just keep up my weekly spam weeding.

Truth be told, I do get a chuckle or two out of the process. While most of the spam is just jibberish to build up keyword counts for everything from drugs to knock-off designer bags, some of them are kind of funny. Here are a few snippets from this week's crop.

After getting more than 10000 visitors/day to my website I thought your website also need unstoppable flow of traffic...this BRAND NEW software...in testing phase generated 867,981 visitors and $540,340. Then another $86,299.13 in 90 days to be exact. That's $958.88 a day!!

An unstoppable flow of traffic? I dream of that! (Not!) Although I won't count on it,  I'd take a grand a day from my humble blog. I'm sure it's worth it. Right?

I've noticed a shift in spam recently. In an effort to dodge automatic detection, many spammy comments start out with a nice "compliment".

I visited several blogs however the audio feature for audio songs present at this web page is truly excellent.

Thanks. But, the audio songs on this site are, eh, non-existent.

Other spammers direct their compliments to the blog's author.

I do not know who you are but definitely you're going to a famous blogger if you are not already ;)

Why, thank you... 

I think the person or computer that crafted these words intended it to be a compliment. But, I'm not really sure. 

Whаt i do not realіze іѕ if truth be told how уou are now not really muсh more neatlу-favorеd than you might be right now. 

Neatly-favored. Me? Never!

When someone writes an article he/she retains the plan of a user in his/her brain that how a user can understand it. Thus that's why this post is outstdanding.

That one lost something in translation. But, hey, my post was outstdanding! 

Some of this week's spam contained some helpful advice. I suppose this made sense to the poor soul hovered over a keyboard typing comments in a foreign language for two cents a piece.

Shoppіng is some thing that ought to be approасhed with sοme preparing. You cannot just go into іt thіnking yοu arе gοing tо save cash and come out ahead. 

Before we go, we'll end with my favorite. 

It's the best time to make some plans for the future and it's time to be happy.

Absolutely!